the peppermill - las vegas , nv

the peppermill is right on the strip , across the street from the stardust . and things suck there just as uniformly as they do on the rest of the strip , or state for that matter .

vegas makes me ill . perhaps it was the ten free drinks at the craps table the night before , or perhaps not going to sleep til six a.m. but , as we all know the cure for that is always the same : a little cfs and coffee .

it was about eleven a.m. on sunday , may the seventh . this place had more people in it than the sports book and the keno lounge put together . i had to wait for a table for about ten minutes , and then ended up with a spot at the counter . service here is strictly hurry up and wait . this isnt the fault of the staff , in fact , angela , my waitress was jogging between tables just to keep up .

i ordered about ten minutes after i sat down . i had a little cup of coffee and proceeded to dump whatever dairy substitute was available into it . then remarked aloud that there was no sugar . ( im a real candy ass and need to have my coffee resemble coffee ice cream to make it palatable . ) another customer told me that the miniature creamer with the multi-colored plastic things in it was in fact sugar . " sugar , vegas style " , he said . just as soon as i dumped my daily requirement of what looked like rainbow brite's cremated remains into my coffee the chicken fried steak and eggs train pulled into the station .

the chicken fried steak was as big as my open hand , upon sight of this beast i almost forgave vegas making me drink too much and learning how to play craps . though , upon closer inspection , this thing was . . . dare i say a little over done ? about as brown as a dark chocolate bar . the ' chicken fried ' portion of the cfs was particularly thick and the steak parts suspiciously thin . it was as hard on the teeth as a still mooing cow's ass ( that the steak part may have come from ) .

there wasnt enough cold gravy even to cover thie cfs . the one thing to make this old shoe leather edible was given little more than a passing thought .

one of the two eggs came to me as i had ordered it , over medium . a little liquid yellow yolk and a little cooked yolk . two great tastes that go great together . the other one , came to me as its scrambled brother . oh well .

the potatoes were adequate .

the pepper mill , like all the rest of vegas is nearly schizophrenic . it gets two ratings :

the waitress rating :

the food :

in other words , we here at mishaco recommend the waitresses over the food . ninety percent of the ladies here could easily make twice what they do waiting tables with half the work in the " professional exotic dancer " industry . my compliments to them . as tough as stripping is , this is a harder job with none of the same benefits .

a side note : whats the deal that in vegas , during every meal you have to start smoking , talking on yer cel phone and chew with yer mouth open ?